backward unexpectedly. Do you know that feeling? I've been feeling it
a lot, lately.
There are blogs I never published, because they aren't public. This
explains, partly, the gap in my posting. I have things on my mind I
cannot share. Or I can share different things with different people.
When is the last time you felt that way? Have you written long
letters, then burned them, or given them irrelevant file names?
Our feelings are like water. They can drip annoyingly, trickle
pleasingly, refresh, drown, or burst a dam. We can't live without them
(sorry, Spock).
Periodically the water flows to a place it doesn't fit: a flood. Options:
• Staunch the emotion: maybe impossible, but if you could, maybe a
disservice to who or what you're emotional about
• Build a bigger dam: forestalls the inevitable
• Redirect the water: build some reservoirs and irrigation trenches
and use your gift to grow something beautiful
• Do nothing: dam fails, homes and fields flood
With mixed feelings I admit I've had a lot of practice. I'm getting
very good at "life."
Please excuse me. I have ditches to dig.
My letters to burn are kept as draft emails. I also have about half a dozen blogs that would probably be good reads, if I had the guts to hit publish. You're not the only one, and I suspect there are more of us.
ReplyDeleteWhy not just say what I need to say? Partly respect. I write stuff out to make sure I'm not just using someone else as a dumping ground for my own insecurities. No one deserves that.
It took me a long time to admit the other part of why not. Often, I'm afraid of the answer - so I don't ask the question.
Water is to gardening as feelings are to life - complicated. Not enough, and nothing beautiful grows; too much, and everything is ruined. Balance is everything.
Good luck with your ditches.